I'm Not Gonna Call

Eight weeks ago, I had what was considered major abdominal surgery.  The surgery went well, but recovery has been frustrating because I’m not one to lie low for long.  It has been during this recovery period that I have realized something about the phrase, “Call me if you need anything.”  I don’t call.

This isn’t meant to offend anyone as I have VERY FREQUENTLY said the same phrase to many, many friends….be sure to call if you need anything.  Guess what?  No one has ever called me!  Am I surprised?  (Relieved?)  It makes me feel good to offer help; it’s like I’m doing what a good friend should do.  But really, what am I actually doing?  There may be a handful of people who actually call when they need help, but I am not one of them and it would seem my friends aren’t either.  Honestly, I’m not going to call someone and say, “Remember when you offered to help?  Can you scrub my tub?  De-clutter my counter?  Make the kids practice the piano?  Change the sheets on all the beds?  Get the oil changed on the minivan?”  Post-surgery, there were a number of little things that needed to be done, and it bugged me that I couldn’t do anything about them as I was confined to the sofa and flying high on pain meds.

[Ok, in the name of full disclosure, there have been some emergency situations where I have HAD to call people.  Like the time I took my daughter to the emergency room and needed someone to pick up my son from another location.  Or, two weeks post-surgery when I had a friend drive me to the store so I could buy elastic waist stretchy pants as all the abdominal swelling caught me by surprise.  In a desire to make sure I had pants, I think anyone would have taken me on that errand!]

Because I have a husband and three children who are not toddlers, my thinking was, “I’m not calling someone else when there are four able-bodied people who live here.”  However, there were extra circumstances in the few weeks before my surgery that deeply affected our family.  Our eldest son lost his friend in a tragic drowning accident when all the high school youth group boys were away on a missions trip.  A week after the funeral, my nine-year-old daughter fell and badly broke her arm, requiring surgery to have titanium rods inserted into both forearm bones.  She ended up in a fingertips-to-armpit cast.  Throw in my surgery and a four-day hospitalization and it was a stress filled month, with lots of tears shed.

During this time, the acts of kindness and love showered on our family were overwhelming and humbling!  Our friends and family jumped into action, taking care of our whole family.

It was the many gestures of care that fully opened my eyes to the fact that while offering help is nice, doing something specific is the way to go.

This is by no means a complete list, but here are some ideas of how to reach out to someone in need.  All these acts of love were extended to us, but if I included every single one, you would be reading for a couple hours!  (And, to list all that my mom did to keep our home, our family and home schooling up and running when I was not….it would take a book!)

SHARE RESOURCES: Some friends with extra Cubs tickets gave them to our son so he and my husband could enjoy a night out.  It was a prefect break from all the tear-filled days and nights our son had been going through after burying his friend.  It did not erase what happened, but it was a temporary break.  And who doesn’t need a little break from the day-to-day reality of sadness and loss?  It is the little breaks that keep us going and give us hope that we can smile again.  Knowing that music is my son’s “language” another friend made him a CD of music.  She also wrote a letter explaining why she included each song, and what messages of hope and promise were to be found.

Think of what you can do to minister to a friend in need and go for it!  Have you read an encouraging book with a message that could help a friend?  Buy it for her!  I had one friend who knew of my “swelly belly” woes and the next week, she delivered a pair of her super comfy pj’s for me to borrow.

MEAL PLANNING: A dear friend set up a meal schedule where our dinners were provided, three times a week for the first six weeks of my recovery!  My husband was so appreciative in knowing the responsibility of making dinner was very frequently removed from his plate.  (I was comforted in knowing the kids were eating more than chicken nuggets or hotdogs every night!)  Many people like to provide meals, but to have someone spearhead and organize all the meals is invaluable.  Two easy resources to use are www.mealbaby.com and www.mealtrain.com.

Even if you don’t cook, or don’t have time to cook, you can still help!  We had two friends bless us with restaurant gift cards and two other friends delivered big, ready-to-cook meals from Costco!

FLOWERS: This one seems so obvious, but how many times have you actually brought flowers to a friend who didn’t have a baby?  My mother-in-law had flowers delivered to my daughter by a florist, a HUGE “first” for a little girl.  Family and friends also brought flowers, and she was so proud of them that she insisted on taking pictures of each arrangement.  I also had flowers brought to me a few times and you can’t help but smile and be cheered by a beautiful floral bouquet!

Flowers are easy – every grocery store has a selection.  Go seasonal and get a basket of mums.  Or an evergreen centerpiece.  Or an Easter lily.  Flowers are a guaranteed smile generator!

DO WHAT THEY LOVE: People who know me know that I have a thing for coffee.  An all out love affair might be a more accurate description.  Not once, not twice, but TEN times during recovery, friends stopped by to deliver some form of hot coffee.  Talk about feeling the love!  By general standards, it was a simple gesture, but it meant the world to me.  I knew there was thought and love poured into each cup of coffee!  My daughter received the same thoughtful “deliveries” during her broken arm/surgery.  Friends stopped by with things that make a kid smile: a fruit smoothie, new stuffed animals, silly bands, balloons, games, favorite candy, pens for signing the cast, a gift card to her favorite coffee shop.  She remained in constant awe of the on going out pouring of care.

Whether a $1 or $20 gift, the result was the same – a huge smile and the feeling of being loved.  Think of a friend who needs to feel some care and support…what does he/she love?  Then, do it!  A bakery muffin?  Hot chocolate?  A new release book to read during a time of recovery?  A scented candle?

GET CREATIVE: It’s been firmly established that I have amazing friends and their wonderful creativity should be copied!  Friends brought cooking magazines for me to peruse, hand lotion and lip balm to ward off the dry air in the hospital, a favorite box of tea, a pad of sticky notes to jot down the things I needed to remember for later…the list goes on!  One friend stopped by with a grocery bag full of fruits and veggies, and we were all thrilled to find Honeycrisp apples in the bag!  Another friend went to a used book sale and got some travel books about my dream destination for me to enjoy.  An autumn-themed cookie bouquet was delivered to the house.  (A wonderful alternative to flowers for anyone with hay fever or flower allergies.)

Aren’t these creative and very do-able ideas?  It takes some extra thought, but your friends are worth it!  A decade ago, just days before having another baby, a friend came over to give me a pedicure!  I would NEVER have called and ask that a friend give me a pedicure, but I didn’t refuse it when she and said, “I’m coming over to do this as my gift to you.”  When a great idea pops into your head, either do it right away, or write it down so you don’t forget.

MAKE SPECIFIC OFFERS: If you are unsure how to help a friend in need, suggest some specific ideas to him/her and see where it leads.  Place yourself in their shoes and imagine what would be helpful.  A number of times, I had various friends call and say, “I’m at the grocery store right now.  What can I pick up for you?”  We usually needed something, and they were more than happy to pick up milk, bread, cheese or eggs.  A few times when different friends stopped over for a visit, they would ask if any one of the kids needed to be driven anywhere, as I was still restricted from driving and my husband was not home.  I took them up on the various offers to drive the kids to school for evening choir rehearsal or work or youth group or baseball practice.  I had a couple crazy friends come to visit who insisted on washing some dishes and cleaning the counters while I sat and we chatted.

When you’re out and about running errands, think of how you can double up your efforts to help a friend.  Running to the post office?  Ask if any packages need to be mailed or stamps purchased.  Going to the library?  Offer to return their books.  Will you be at the grocery store?  Ask if they want a movie from the rental kiosk.  When you are taking your garbage cans to the curb and back again, grab your neighbor’s and do the same.  If you look for ways to be helpful, you WILL find them!

(As a side note: If you think it will be an added stress to your friend to appear unannounced at her door with flowers, coffee, a bag of groceries, etc., just say, “I can’t come in, but I just wanted you to know we care.”  Receiving the message of being loved is never stressful!)

Although this seems to be an over-used phrase in this blog, please do not under estimate the power of thoughtful care in the smallest gesture!!!  After the past couple months, I know that I will be offering help to others in very specific ways.  If you have kids, just think of the example you are setting as you strive to teach them to be “other” focused.  Enlist their help and your efforts have just doubled themselves!

It is unrealistic to assume we can do everything for everyone in need.  Sometimes there are time and distance restraints.  (This is when email and snail mail works the best.)  But, do what you can, for who you can, when you are able.  Proactively look for ways to bless others.  Let God use you to be a light of encouragement and a source of generosity to those He has placed in your life.  And, generosity isn’t limited to giving money…it is the giving of YOURSELF, in some way, to love on another.

As Time Goes By

Nope, I have not forgotten about this blog! I've written new things and have jotted many notes for new ideas. But life has thrown us some unexpected curve balls...the kind that can temporarily disable the routine of life, and all effort is put into maintaining ANY semblance of normalcy.

So give me another week or two and I hope to be back in the saddle! I've missed this. But it got ratcheted down a few notches. And to dispel any worry, my family and I are okay and will be okay.

My Model Mom

A few years ago, our local paper ran a “Model Mom” contest, asking people to provide an essay explaining the most important lesson they learned from their mom.  I emailed my submission per the instructions….then never heard back, nor saw the “Model Mom” feature in any upcoming issues.  I was pretty bummed, since there was supposed to be “a prize fit for a model mom!”  Recently, while clearing out some clutter (fit to be moved by a new model bulldozer), I ran across my original submission and decided to share what I wrote about the best lesson I learned from my mom.  (And from looking at my home, it seems the lesson I should have learned is that I don’t need to save every little thing “just in case” since “just in case” rarely, if ever, happens.)

“The most important lesson my mom taught me is the gift of hospitality.  Not entertaining, with lots of preparation and planning and impressive food and decorations…although she DID teach me that too.  The real lesson was in true hospitality, which always cost less in money, but “cost” more in time and thought.

Our family of five lived in a small, neat and tidy 2-bedroom, 1-bathroom, no upstairs, no basement home.  Many will say they have a small house, and I’ve even heard people say they can’t have people over because their house is too small.  Our house was 576 square feet.  Five people.  (Did I mention we were homeschooled?)  We qualify for saying that we truly grew up in a small home.  [Not-in-original-submission side note here: to give you a visual, a standard 2 ½ car garage is about the size of my childhood home…yeah, really small for a house.]  Mom always taught us that hospitality was about the other person and extending friendship, and NOT about the home itself.  She taught it, she believed it and she practiced it.

As a child, I remember it being a regular occurrence that people came over for a meal or coffee and dessert.  Despite our small home, no one ever refused an invitation due to the size of the house or having to squeeze in around the table.  My mom was (and still is) very others oriented and she realized early on that hospitality is something one must purpose to do.  She never waited to have a 5-course meal prepared and freshly ironed linens on the table before asking a family, or a new widow, or a neighbor to come over.  Mom saw a need to reach out to those around her and she did it.  People learned we had an “open door policy” and could always count on a fresh cup of coffee, a listening ear, and possibly fresh-baked muffins.  Having friends into our home went beyond the “obligatory” reasons: holidays, kid’s birthday parties, baby showers, etc.  Having people over was a regular occurrence and it taught me life-lasting principals.

When I got married and had my own home, I purposed to practice hospitality on a regular basis.  [Another side note: it took some practice to convince myself that the house didn’t HAVE to be perfect and the food amazing before opening my door.  In hindsight, I wonder why we have to practice being normal in front of others?!?!]  Now, no matter how busy we get, my kids and husband are never surprised to walk in the door and find people gathered around the table.  It’s rarely a fancy meal – we often order a pizza or throw some hotdogs on the grill.  Sometimes it’s coffee and brownies in the afternoon or chips and salsa.  (Mom also taught me to keep a baked dessert in the freezer or a fast snack in the cabinet to serve on those spur-of-the-moment occasions.)  In my experience, no one has ever turned down an offer of friendship and hospitality just because the floors are in serious need of a sweeping, or because there are 2 (or 3) (ok, fine….probably 4) baskets of clean laundry in the living room, or because I can’t actually see my kitchen counter.  (…or the top of the china cabinet…or the desk…)  It’s not about the house or the food.  It’s about the friendship and the thought behind it.

Mom taught me to worry less about my house and care more about others, and to use my home as a shelter to more than just my family.  And, I understand something she has known for years.  When reaching out to those around me, it usually ends up being me who receives the biggest blessing!  Mom, thanks for teaching me a life-lessons that can’t be taught from a book!”

I think it’s the paper’s loss that they never ran with the idea of printing “Model Mom” submissions because I would have loved to hear other’s stories!

And, I bet my mom is wondering how I never picked up on her “use it or toss it” mantra.  It’s like I’m stuck in the “save it to potentially use it” mode.  *Sigh*  Be warned: you’ll have to move a basket or two the next time you come over.

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Game.....

When the kids and I were driving out to the baseball game this afternoon, we were stopped at a light directly behind a huge SUV.  There were 3 really big stickers (bigger than your average bumper sticker) on the SUV's backend, each one advertising something about Jesus.  We all noticed the stickers and the websites they promoted...it was hard NOT to notice.  My eldest son even joked about them "really being into their Jesus ads."

Also at the stoplight were appropriately badged, neon-vest wearing volunteers walking through the lanes of cars, collecting change for a local food pantry.  They also handed out paper information about the food bank.  The volunteer paused at the SUV then moved on after getting nothing from the SUV's driver.

Huh.  That's what we said.  We figured that maybe there was no change in the vehicle.  "It doesn't have to be change.  It can be a whole dollar."  Huh.  Then, we imagined that the driver just lost his job and had no money to give.  "Then how could he put gas in his SUV?  And anyway, you could always give a quarter."  Huh.  It's possible we are all missing something, but we can't figure what it would be.

It was odd to see a bumper stickered-Jesus vehicle not give anything to the food pantry.  My kids thought it was odd.  I'm actually glad they saw and recognized this dichotomy.

I read the information about the food pantry that had been handed to me.  There was a William Penn quote on it that read: If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, and not deter or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again.

Be careful what you advertise.  You're being watched.  Does your advertisement match the real product?

Huh.

Don't Wait For the Funeral

It was one year ago today that I had a “life flashing before my eyes” experience.  In a nutshell: I took some ibuprofen (which I HAD taken before) and had a severe allergic reaction.  The emergency room doctor said I was in anaphylactic shock by the time I got off the ambulance, but gratefully, my airway was never blocked.  (One of the few things that I remember from the ambulance ride was seeing my blood pressure reading of 62/44 and knowing that was far too low, especially for someone being treated for high blood pressure!  The EMT also asked me if I knew what year it was, and after great effort, I answered “yes” but it seems he wanted a different answer.)

This scary experience was the first time I ever truly wondered if I was dying.  Not as in, “Did you see the ending to that movie?!  Ohmigosh, I almost died!” but a real, concrete thought of is this what people feel like before they die?  After the episode was over, I had a difficult time falling asleep for a few days.  Each time I closed my eyes, I would “hear” an ambulance siren and my mind would start to wander to thoughts like what if I really DID die?  I actually thought about how there’d be nothing nice that fit properly to bury me in, so I hoped my husband would opt for cremation.  Then I thought about how my bathtub soooo needed a good scrubbing and wouldn’t I be embarrassed to die and leave it like that?!  (I wish I was kidding or exaggerating; sadly, I’m not.)  I wondered if my husband would remember that I wanted good coffee and a buffet table under a big party tent at my wake and funeral, and NO ORGAN MUSIC!  (I even suggested a jumpy house for the younger kids, as I firmly believe in highlighting the FUN in FUNeral.  Just go with me on this one...)  I thought about how young moms shouldn’t die, and what would my family do?!  I then started thinking about the genuinely sweet words of love and friendship expressed to me after this incident (via written notes, phone calls, emails and Facebook messages) and I was grateful and humbled.  My twisted line of thinking finally led me to believe that we should eulogize while alive.

Almost every wake or funeral I have attended has included multitudes of people remembering the good times, the funny stories, and the highlights of the life of the person who had passed away.  And I always wondered if the deceased person should have heard all this positive stuff before he/she died.  I think the answer is YES!  The fond memories shared after death are only to comfort those left behind…it’s too late for the person who died.  How much good could come from sharing…from eulogizing…before death?!  I think we can all use a good word now and then and how special it would be to hear, “You’re a great friend and here’s why……” or “I love you because…..”  Why not write a note or email or make a call to let a friend or family member know VERY SPECIFICALLY why they are so special to you.  Let your children know what you admire about them and be detailed.  Tell your spouse why you respect him and give an example.  Tell a parent what you have learned from them and how it’s positively affected you as an adult.  Don’t leave things unsaid while there is time NOW!!  It will do a world of good for the heart of the listener!

And now I gotta go scrub the tub so I can sleep well tonight…..

It Was in the Sour Cream

I received an email from a dear friend and she told me about a recent, super-encouraging situation she experienced.  Below is her story.

“I have to tell you something that happened today - and after it happened, I was in my car tearing up at the generosity and thoughtfulness of what was done.

Yesterday, I went to Aldi to get some shopping done.  I needed to do major shopping as I hadn't done it for about two weeks, and I had a lot of pantry staples to purchase.

I was in the check out lane with a cartload of groceries, and as I picked up the carton of light sour cream to put it on the conveyor belt, I noticed there was some sour cream on the bottom of the carton.  I flipped the light sour cream carton over and saw that there was a crack across the bottom of the carton.  To make matters worse, some of the sour cream had gotten on the conveyor belt.  I put the light sour cream carton, flipped upside down, on the conveyor belt and put my other groceries around it.  As soon as the cashier was done with the person in front of me, I planned to ask her throw away the sour cream and then let me clean up the mess.

There was a guy in line behind me who appeared to be about 60 years old.  He smiled at me and made some crack about how "you're not supposed to open the food until you get home."  I smile and joked back, "Well, I WAS kinda hungry..."  When I get to the front of the line, I told the cashier what happened, and she just laughed and then cleaned up the conveyor belt for me.  (Even though I said I would!)  I then noticed that the person who had checked out just ahead of me happened to set aside a few items that she couldn't afford.  One of the items, the only refrigerated item, was a carton of sour cream.  I thought, "PERFECT! I'll save someone a trip from having to put that back in the refrigerated section and I’ll buy it!"  I told the cashier that I would take the unwanted sour cream and she said, "It's not light, but is that ok with you?"  At this point I really didn't care, and I wasn't going to hold up the line just to go get a light sour cream...so I figured this worked out well.

All of a sudden, the gentleman who had been standing behind me showed up (I did not realize that he had left the line), and he was holding a new carton of light sour cream.  He said, "I wanted to do something nice for you, and I just can't afford to buy your groceries.  But I thought I could at least so something to help and get you another carton of light sour cream."  And then he said (and I can't believe this), "I wanted to help because it looks like you're a woman trying to hold the world together."

Wow.

I thanked him profusely, paid for my groceries and started to bag my order.  He only had a few items, and as he walked out, he told me to have a good day.  I got to the car, called my husband to tell him about what had happened and it made me cry!  I told my husband this guy was way too old to be hitting on me…it was purely an act of simple kindness.  This man knew exactly what I needed to hear to feel a sense of relief and worth.  The man didn't know this, but as I was standing in line, I was doing a lot of thinking and praying.  I was asking God yet again why He would allow my husband to lose his job and take new job opportunities away from him.  God sure does amazing things and uses people in some cool ways.

This little act of kindness made my ENTIRE day.  I thought of the purpose behind your blog, and I just had to share my story!”

Cool story, huh?  This was truly a “small thing” that this man did for my friend…and yet the affect was multiplied a hundred-fold!  This man understood that sometimes we WANT to do the big, super-meaningful things, like pay for someone’s groceries, but we can’t.  He then took the initiative to do what he could, and it meant the world to the recipient of his kind action and thoughtfulness.

Let’s all look for something we can do to show love, thoughtfulness, compassion, and care to someone else.  Our effort, no matter how small, can have a monumental positive affect and that should not be overlooked!

Look for ways to be thoughtful and give someone else a “sour cream” story!  I’d love to hear about it!

The Home Run That Wasn't

Today, we have a guest writer!  Over the weekend, there was a "situation" at our eldest son's baseball game. There were many different reactions to the situation, both health and unhealthy.  This situation prompted my husband to write the following post.  (And I just need to say how grateful I am for a good man who sees the "bigger picture" of our boy's involvement in sports!)  Enjoy!

In a recent baseball game, my son hit a ball far over the outfielder’s head.  Because there were no fences, once the ball hit the ground, it rolled for another couple hundred feet.  According to Google Earth, the approximate distance to where the fielder eventually picked up the ball was more than 500 feet!  After Alex and his teammate (who had been on first base) easily circled the bases, the celebration began as the game was now tied at 4.

When the other team threw the ball back in to the infield, the opposing manager instructed his team to appeal at third base, claiming that Alex had missed touching the base.  The sole umpire at the game ruled that Alex had touched the base and gave the safe sign.  “Try second base!” the manager yelled.  The umpire took a moment and then ruled that Alex had missed second base and called him out.

As you can imagine, this was met by a cheer for the other side and much yelling and screaming by coaches and parents on our side.  Despite protests, both civilized and uncivilized, the umpire’s ruling stood.  There was no 2-run homerun; just a single run was counted (for the runner who was on base when Alex was batting) and our team had another out counted against us.  This call took the wind out of the sails of our team and the game was eventually lost by a large margin.

I want my kids to participate in sports for many different reasons.  They learn to play on a team, they get a good amount of exercise and they learn to win and lose as “good sports” (I hope).  They also can learn other valuable life lessons which were played out in this home run situation.

1) Life is not fair.  Your accomplishments will not always be recognized and circumstances can actually change to put you in a bad light.  In Genesis, we see that Joseph made the morally correct choice in resisting the advances of Potiphar’s wife.  Surely, Joseph made the right choice.  But, was he rewarded for this?  No.  Joseph was made to look like the one who had acted unscrupulously and was thrown into prison.  As it turns out, God needed Joseph in prison to serve His purpose.  Not only was Alex not given a home run, it actually counted as an out.  While we may not see it right now, God always has a purpose and a plan.

2) Details matter.  Whether it is touching all the bases or knowing your responsibility as an umpire to watch whether or not all the bases were touched, details matter.  In Numbers 20, when the Israelites were in the desert and desperately needed water, God instructed Moses to speak to the rock and water would come forth.  Instead, Moses struck the rock with his staff as he had done in a previous situation, and water came forth.  However, Moses was punished for not following exactly what God had instructed him to do.  There are times where God needs us to obey Him in a specific way.  “Love one another” is something God asks us to do, but He doesn’t always give us a specific way in which to obey that command.  When He does give us a specific charge, He means it!

3) There is always someone in authority over you.  In baseball, the umpire is in charge and sometimes you may not like what he or she decides, but the game will go on with their decision in place.  In life, we all have someone in authority over us.  Whether it is our boss, our teacher, our parent, our pastor or our government, there is an authority structure over us by which we are forced to live.  The good news is that God is the one Who determines our authority structure.  He accomplishes His purpose through the authority, even when we don’t like what they are deciding.  Except in cases of clear sin, we are to submit to our authority.

4) Complaining doesn’t help – it just makes things worse.  After so vehemently reacting to the umpire, whether it was fans or coaches, one can’t help but think that the benefit of the doubt was going to go to the other team.  The umpire had to warn fans and coaches about not continuing to argue or he would have them removed as he is entitled to do.

Romans 13:1 – 5:

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. For he is God's servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God's servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience. (NIV)

5) When we face adversity, we need to rise above it and keep on fighting.  Very often, this is seen in the world of sports.  A bad call.  A bad hop on a groundball.  An easy fly ball dropped because it was lost in the sun.  These are all factors beyond our control that can easily discourage us.  The truly successful teams do not let these things keep them down…they keep fighting.

This is also true in our Christian walk.  Satan will be there at every turn accusing us of wrong doing and driving us to discouragement.  We are to follow the example of the Apostle Paul who faced much adversity (imprisonment, shipwreck, etc.) and who was able to say “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7).

6) God has a purpose and a plan for our lives.  Our job is to do things His way and to let God bring about the consequences and results He desires.  The consequences are intended for our good and to work toward His ends.  Two key verses come to mind on this point for those who are following the Lord.

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (NIV)

Romans 8:28 - And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (NIV)

God is always at work and we need to learn to see the things that happen to us through His eyes.  A long home run is a great memory, but life lessons that can be passed along to others are of even greater value.